I have a question for you. How do you make a lazy human being exercise?
Ok, you have had the requisite 2 seconds to answer, so I will tell you.
First, you act like you don’t know what you’re doing and all you want to do is play. At least that’s what I found to work. You see, my boy’s house has this cool front yard. Well, parts of it are cool.
There are these holes in it that are covered with green things. My boy’s dad calls them covers for water valves.
See, I don’t understand humans. Those green things are no more covers for water valves than I am a cat. What would you call round green things that are hanging out in a yard? Me, I call them Frisbees. The only difference between them and the Frisbees I played with in Ohio is that these Frisbees seem to like to hang out in certain places in the yard. The Ohio Frisbees liked to go all over the place.
Sorry about getting a little off track. My boy’s dad, Jim, would say my ADD is showing.
Ok, that’s another thing I don’t understand about my boy’s dad. He keeps saying I have ADD just like Loren and him. His evidence is that I like to play a lot, but give me a break. That’s what a boy’s best friend is supposed to do. Sometimes I want to sit this guy down and tell him of course I can add. I am a dog, aren’t I? I mean, I could understand his confusion if I was a cat or something, but I am a dog. I can also subtract, multiply and divide too.
Ok, so anyway, what you do to make guys like Jim exercise is to pick up one of the green Frisbees. Then, instead of coming directly to him when he says, Renata, “come”, I just saunter over to the middle of the yard and stare at him, with that, “what are you going to do now, big guy” look.
That’s when the real fun begins. See, after a few seconds, he starts walking toward me like he’s just going to take the Frisbee from me. So, I crouch down a bit with that, “as soon as you get to me, I’m going to run rings around you, you silly human” look.
He, he, this is really funny. So you know what he does? He crouches down, too. Now me, I would keep walking toward me, but this silly human crouches down and just stares at me like he’s saying, “ok, you silly dog, you’re not gonna get away from me.” So, naturally, I take off and keep my promise. I run rings around him while he keeps following me but, I am a kind and gentle creature, so after a few minutes of watching him zigzag around the yard, I make it look like I lose my footing and let Jim catch me. And take my green Frisbee.
I get the last bark, though. See, there are four of these things in the yard, so I just go and get another one. Then the game starts again and my boy’s dad gets a good workout.
That, however, is playtime. I am doing pretty good getting Jim, my boy’s mom (Kim) and my boy to learn how to play the “take” and “bring” games. That’s where I wait for them to tell me to “take” and “bring” my ball. What that really means is I go get the ball and bring it back and put it in their hands. It’s good for a few treats and it keeps them happy, so I play along.
Now that I have told you how to get a human to exercise, here’s my real point. I have found that most humans are pretty stubborn. That means they don’t want to do what you tell them to do. Instead, they take perfectly good directions like God gave them in the Bible and proceed to do everything except what they are told to do.
I have found, though, that if you get a human being to focus on something other than them, then you have a chance to teach them something. That’s basically what Jesus did. See, He is the son of God, and also part of God and to get human beings back on the right track, he hatched a really wonderful plan.
You can read it all in the bible, but the whole point of everything Jesus did, aside from saving these silly humans from themselves, was to tell them how much He and God loved them and how much He and God wanted all these silly humans to live with Him forever. So, He became one of them, died a very ugly death, even though He was innocent and, then, He came back to life.
That, got the attention of a lot of these human beings and, while they concentrate on getting to know Jesus and understanding what it is He did, He will make sure they get to heaven and live with Him forever.
When you think about it, that’s a pretty cool plan. It’s so simple, these humans will never know what hit them.
Well, that’s the way I see it. Have a great day.
Hi Everyperson!
My name is Renatta and this is my blog. I don’t know why I have a blog since I am a dog and don’t know how to type, but, since I was born, I haven’t been able to make much sense of what people do anyway. All I really know is that my boy’s dad said I had to start this blog to tell people what I do and what they can learn from me. That’s actually a really good idea since people need a lot of training and we dogs are excellent trainers, unlike cats…well, that’s another topic entirely.
First, I need to tell you about my third favorite subject – me. I am a service dog. I was born on April 8, 2010. My mom is a German Shepherd and my dad is a Golden Retriever. That means I am an extremely smart dog with a very sweet disposition. I am very outgoing and never meet a stranger, but I am a little hyperactive, so, all things considered, I am a perfect fit for my boy and my second favorite subject – Loren.
Now, before you go judging me as conceited, the description I just gave you is from my boy’s mom.
Now, a little bit about my second favorite subject, Loren. I figure I should give him a little credit in my blog since this was, after all, his blog to begin with. Also, he is the love of my life. Loren and I are soul-mates. He is also outgoing, never meets a stranger and is definitely hyperactive.
I first met Loren on June 21, 2011 when he came to Ohio, where I am from, to be trained. See, that just proves my point about humans needing training. Loren and his mom, along with Loren’s friend Matt and his mom, had to fly all the way from Louisiana to Ohio to learn how to follow my instructions. Oh, I know, they think it was the other way around, but with their pride, do you honestly think a human being can possibly believe that we dogs are actually the ones doing the training?
Anyway, when I saw this 3 ½ foot thirteen-year old with a bit of a short attention span and the sweetest disposition in the world…well, it was love at first sight. As soon as I saw him, I knew we were going places. You see, most of the other dogs in my graduating class just sat around and waited for the humans to do their tricks (they call them commands), but Loren and I weren’t as interested in that as we were into meeting everyone. Loren would go up and introduce himself and ask everyone what they were doing, or having for dinner, or a few other things. Me, well, I would saunter over and lick people. Why people think licking is so cute, I don’t know, but they do.
Anyway, we spent the next two weeks getting to know each other, and then we headed back to where Loren lives. I guess you can tell that I am from the North because I tend to use proper English. Now that I live in the south, I have found that I have a bit of a language barrier. In case you didn’t notice, I used the southern way of saying things a little while ago when I said, I figure, but that’s not how I was taught to speak. Unfortunately, I now live in the south where everybody says words like y’all, figure, folks, etc. I suppose I am going to have to watch movies like Steel Magnolias to learn how to communicate with my boy and his family.
We flew from Ohio, to Dallas, Texas and then to Louisiana. I knew I was in trouble when I got to Dallas. You see, I am black and have fairly long hair. When I was in Ohio, the nights were cool and the days were not nearly as hot as they are here in Shreveport. To top that off, it’s very humid here and, well, all I can say is thank the Dog God for water. We sat on the plane for a while in Dallas and the flight attendant didn’t let me have much water, even though I am entitled to it as a service dog. The male flight attendant tried to help, but the female flight attendant was not as nice, so I was really hot and dehydrated when we got to Shreveport.
The heat was even worse for my brother, Embry (his boy is Matt), because he is bigger and has longer hair, but for some reason, he got more water from the lady flight attendant. If I was a human, I would get a lawyer and sue for sex discrimination, but human courts are too fickle and I would probably lose. That’s alright, though, because when we finally left the airplane in Shreveport, the pilot saw us and told the flight attendant to get some water. When he opened the bottle, he poured some water in his hand and let me drink from it. Then he gave the water to Matt’s mom so she could give Embry some water. All-in-all, I’d say the pilot was a pretty good man.
That, then, was my introduction to southern hospitality. As time goes by, I will continue to tell you about my trip and first few days at my new home, but, I don’t want to get away from the purpose of this blog, which is to inform and train you humans on my first favorite subject - God.
Yeah, I can hear all you humans out there thinking things like, What does a dog know about God or Dogs don’t really think, so they can’t possibly know anything about God. Well, I have news for you. If you take a look at your history, you will note that not a single war, inquisition, torture campaign or environmental disaster was started by a dog. That’s right, all those things can be attributed to you humans.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I love humans. As a race, you folks (oh my goodness, another southern colloquialism) are pretty entertaining. You play Frisbee and ball. You make funny sounds when you try to get us dogs to come to you and, let’s face it, that baby talk stuff is hilarious. Still, you do tend to cause a lot of damage – far more than me when I play around in the trash can.
My point is this – dogs do what you humans are supposed to do – rely on the one true living God. You know, the father of Jesus Christ. The God who came down from heaven and actually let himself get killed on a cross just so you guys could go to heaven. We dogs just go with the flow and somehow God manages to take care of us. We don’t worry about where the next meal is coming from because He has already got it planned out. We don’t worry who has the biggest car or who has the biggest dog house. God takes care of all that and, by and large, we don’t really need a mansion to live in. We certainly don’t worry what will happen thirty years from now.
With all the things we dogs don’t do, and all the things you humans do to drive yourselves crazy, who has it easier, us or you guys? I’d say it’s us and that’s because we trust God, not ourselves. In fact, except for the survival instinct we were born with, we dogs tend to think more about the people we live with than we do ourselves. Wouldn’t it be nice if humans could think more about each other than themselves? I bet it would be a happier world.
Ok, so here is my plan. I can’t promise that I will write you every day, but when I have something on my mind, I will let you know and today is one of those days. You see, I had to take a shower the other day. My boy’s mom though it would be nice to get the dirt off of me. I don’t know why, because I will just go right back out and get some more, but, like I said you humans are funny things.
For those of you who don’t know, German Shepherds and Golden Retrievers are a pretty big breed. I am no exception. So, when my boy’s mom decided I needed to be clean, she decided the only way to do that was to give me something called a shower. A shower is basically an indoor rainstorm, but without the thunder and lightning, so when I started getting wet, I tried to get away, but she stopped me.
The next thing I know, my boy’s mom is putting this slippery stuff called soap on me. I just don’t understand humans. They want you to get clean, so they get you wet and put more stuff on you. They are weird. At first, I thought there must be some mistake, so I jumped out of the shower and headed to the door, but she stopped me and put me back in the shower. Then she put more of that stuff on me!
Ok, so I figured that she must want me to have this soap on. I don’t know, maybe it somehow magically takes off the dirt. So, I stand there and let my boy’s mom put the soap on me. Since I was almost totally covered with the soap, I thought we were about done, so, as soon as she was finished putting it on me, I jumped out of the shower so I could play with my dog buddy Charlie.
You would have though I raided a garbage can the way my boy’s mom came dragged me back to the shower. I was confused! I was thinking she was off her rocker. How in the world was I supposed to keep the soap on if I went back into the shower? That’s when I found out that I was to let her “rinse” the soap off of me. You see, when the soap mixes with all that dirt, it helps the dirt come off of me. I suppose it grabs old of the dirt and makes it fall off of my body.
That, my friends, is when I thought of a bible verse. Yes, we dogs are pretty smart when it comes to the bible. Don’t forget, we have excellent hearing and we know God personally. That tends to help us think about Him a lot more than most humans.
Let’s see, I believe the bible verse is Isaiah 1:18 and goes like this:
Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
Here is what I thought about after all the shower stuff was over. The pure love that God showed to all you humans when He let Jesus, who was part of Himself by the way, is kind of like that soap. Like I said earlier, you humans tend to do some damage to each other and to yourself. That damage, or sin, is like the dirt on my fur, only you guys tend to have a lot more damage than fur. When Jesus died on the cross for you guys, his love poured out all over you and grabbed hold of that sin just like the soap grabbed hold of the dirt on me.
Are you with me so far? Think of it this way, Sin = Dirt and God’s Love = Soap. So, if God’s Love has grabbed the Sin on you like the soap grabbed the dirt on me, what’s next. Here is my theory, along with a little advice.
First, let me make a point. I could have gotten out of that shower a lot quicker (I am not into showers much) if I would have just let my boy’s mom do her thing and wash me with the soap all at one time. I didn’t do that, though. I fought her and made her chase after me a couple of times. In this case, it wasn’t because I was disobedient; I just didn’t understand human beings.
Guess, what, guys? You are the same way, except you tend to be disobedient too. Whatever your problem is, I bet you that God has an answer for it. That’s especially true if it is sin that’s causing the problem. My theory is that you would be far happier if that sin was washed away like the bible says, but to do that, you have to trust that God knows what He is doing. If you trust God, then you will stay in the shower and let Him get you all cleaned up. Of course, you will probably go back out and get dirty like me again, but that’s ok, because He loves you and is ready to give you another shower again, as long as you trust Him to do what’s right.
So, I came up with two mathematical equations to think about:
My shower equation is Shower + Soap – Dirt = a clean and happy Renatta.
God’s life equation is Trust + God’s Love – Sin = a clean and happy you.
The only thing you need to remember is the same thing I need to remember and that is that you are a human being. Just like we dogs tend to get dirty, so do you humans. Instead of getting all scared and hiding from God when that happens, just go to Him and ask for a Shower of His Love and he will clean you up and make you happy.
Ok, well that’s what I have been thinking about. Have a good night.
Love,
Renatta
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. – Isaiah 40:30-31
Hi everybody!
Ladies and Gentlemen; boys and girls; it’s ME! Yes, ME, the incredible Loren.
How do ya like that for an introduction? That’s what I do when I get on stage. I know, I am not on stage, but I like to say it anyway.
Well, here we are. I last rote to ya on July 8. Wow! It’s only been one and a half months cents I told ya what’s goin’ on.
Uh oh. Ya don’t think that means Daddy’s sick do ya? I mean, sumthing must be wrong if Daddy’s updating my blog this fast.
Ah, who cares. I’m just happy Daddy is doin’ this now. I am sure if Daddy is sick, he will take care of it – after he get the update dun.
Let’s see. What’s been happenin’.
Well, Mommy, Daddy and Trisha took a trip to sumplace called Memphis. I must have a speshul Mommy and Daddy ‘cause they went to sum king’s house. Trisha got to go too. I never heard of this guy, I think his name is Elvis, but they got to go. I don’t understand, though. They said they were in Memphis, but the guy was king of Rockin Roll. Is that sumwhere near Memphis.
Mommy, Daddy and Trisha also went to a place called the National Civil Rights Museum. Daddy said it was really neat. See, they took this place called the Loraine Motel and made it into a museum. Sumbody famus named Martin Luther King got killed there.
Mommy went by herself to a fire fighter’s museum. Trisha and Daddy went and played Putt-Putt when Mommy was at the museum. When Mommy got back to the room, she showed ‘em the fire fighter shirt she bot me. See I couldn’t go ‘cause I was in Shreveport, so she got me a present. Cents Daddy and Trisha didn’t come with her, they didn’t get a present. Guess that’ll teach ‘em. The shirt is grate!
Mommy, Daddy and Trisha then went to a place called Vicksburg. They went thru this old courthouse that is now a museum. They said it was really cool. They bot sum stuff there for friends and Papa Jim. Daddy got sum hospital bullets. Now I don’t know why they call ‘em that. I mean, why would you want to shoot at a hospital. I spent a lot of time in the hospital and, believe me, they aren’t any fun, but I didn’t ever want to kill it.
Daddy says hospital bullets got their name from when dokters had to cut peeple’s legs off. Cents they didn’t have any of the stuff I get when I have an operashun, they gave the peeple’s a bullet. Then, when the leg was cut off, the people wud bite the bullet ‘cause it hurt so bad.
Ok, so that’s what happened to Mommy, Daddy and Trisha. I, on the other hand, got stuck in Shreveport. I missed Mommy and Daddy – ok, Trisha too – but I had Memaw, Pawpaw, Maria, George and everyperson else to keep me playin’. It wazn’t too bad.
August wazn’t that bad of a month. Daddy had a birthday and he, Mommy and Patrick went to a place called New Orleans a cuple of days. Say, do ya think they’re tryin’ to tell me sumthin’? I just been tryin’ to make things go smoothly, but we ran into a problem.
See, when Mommy, Daddy and Trisha got back from their trip, Daddy saw a bump in the floor. Well, now there are a bunch of bumps and even a cuple of places that are big as mountains! Everyperson who has looked at it thinks sumthin’ is leakin’, but we haven’t found out why there is a problem. I think we will have to move out of the house a cuple of weeks while they fix the house.
One bad thing happened this summer. I started taking swim lessons and the next thing I know, I am afraid of swimmin’. It’s the funniest thing…well, not so funny…but when I get in the water, I get real scared and won’t let go of whoever is holding me.
Oh, yeah! I got a new sister! No foolin’. Well, just a little foolin’. She’s not my sister, but she is living with us. See, this nice girl, we will call her Jessica, has moved into our house. ‘Course Jessica isn’t her real name, but Daddy says I can’t use her real name. Her Mommy and her Mommy’s boyfriend don’t want her livin’ with ‘em anymore, so Mommy and Daddy said she cud stay with us for a while on account of she is Patrick’s friend. I don’t know why Jessica’s mommy doesn’t want her living at home, but Mommy and Daddy say sum peeples are just that way. I am glad I don’t have a Mommy and Daddy like that!
So, I been thinkin’. Ya know, I get tired sumtimes and wanna just give up. You know, like when ya keep tryin’ to get a new Wiggles DVD goin’, but ya can’t find the rite buttons. Or, maybe when the physical therapy person keeps puttin’ you in the water and ya really don’t like it. Sooner or later, I just give up and go with the flow of what sumone is tryin’ to do. Well, I do believe in Jesus and I do wait for Him to help me and He always duz. I mean, I don’t fly in the air like eagles, but I do a lot of runnin’ and I know I got lots of energy, just ask Daddy.
God reminds me of sum things, though. Like today. He ‘minded me that things aren’t so bad for me. ‘Cause of what has happened to Jessica, I know I am lucky. I got a Mommy and Daddy who love me. I got a brudder and sister who love me – sumtimes. I got a home. There’s lots of peeples who can’t say that, like Jessica. When y’all have a chance, include Jessica in your prayers. She’s pretty nice and sure cud use some help rite now. I just know if we ask God, He will give her strength, and maybe wings, to beat the bad things in her life.
Nite nite,
Love Loren
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. - Ephesians 6:1-4
Hiya peeples! It's me, Loren. I am here to let ya know what happened today. I just know ya been dyin' to know how my day went today, so I will tell ya. In a wurd - frustratin'.
Let's see, first, I woke up and Daddy got mad at me. I don't know why, all I did waz get in his bed. Ya know, just 'cause I got in bed and started talkin', duzn't mean Daddy had the rite to get mad at me. He even made me get out of bed and go to my room! Sure, he tried to make it look gud by puttin' on a Barney tape, but I knew he waz just tryin' to make me leave the room so he and Mommy cud sleep a little more. It didn't wurk 'cause I made him stay in my room. I can be verrrrrrrrry stubborn sumtimes. Anyperson who tries to get the best of this kid has an edukation comin'!
A little later, Mommy came in the room and said we had to go to church. She told Daddy to wake...
Say, ya know what? Daddy did fall asleep, even if it waz in my bed. Do ya think he really one after all? Naw, can't be. I am too smart to be fooled. Nope! He definitely lost!
Ok, so we went to church and I got to play on the big playground. That waz fun. Oh, I gotta tell ya. I saw a castle today. How they fit it in our parish hall at church, I don't know, but it was a real castle. I get to go there tomorrow to something called Bakation Bible School. They call it VBS for short, but I don't know why. Bakation starts with a "B", not a "V". Like I said before, grownups just can't be figured out!
Then, we went to Memaw's and Pawpaw's house. That was kinda frustratin' 'cause when Daddy said he was goin' home, I wanted to go with him, but he wudn't let me. He said he waz gonna wurk on my web page. So, if he wurked so hard on it, how come it looks the same? That's ok, though, I got to go swimmin' and make cookies. Ha! Ha! I got to have fun and Daddy had to wurk!
Well, that's about it. After that, I just came home and wurked on my update. That's leeds me to my bible stuff tonight. See, mommy's and daddies are always tellin' us to do what they say. Sumthin' 'bout God tellin' kids to honor mommies and daddies. Well, I just want to go on rekord as tellin' ya that there's anuther part of the rules. See, this guy Paul says that daddies (probably mommies too) shouldn't get us kids all frustrated and stuff. I mean, how we gonna lurn anything if we are upset all the time?
I took this part of the bible and showed it to Daddy. Ya know what? He said that he read it a million times and agrees with it. When I asked him why he keeps frustratin' me 'bout updatin' my web page when the bible says he's not s'posed to do that, he just smiled and said, "Well, nobody is purfek." So much for not frustratin' your kid.
Well, nite nite guys. I love all of ya.
Love - Loren
Allow me to introduce myself - I am Jim McClelland. In the post below, which is extremely long, you will come to know me as the guy my son Loren likes to complain about.
Loren is my now almost 9-year-old son. If you want to learn more about him, you can go to www.crystalisland.com. This is an outdated website that I used to keep people posted on his progress during his two bone marrow transplants. Loren has a disease called Hurler Syndrome. He likes to spell it Sindrome because it is a sin anybody, but especially a child less than a year old, should be faced with a disease that will kill him in 5 to 10 years.
Such was the case with Loren. He underwent one transplant in August of 1999 and by October of that year, the transplant was a failure. He underwent a second transplant in January 2000. By September 2000, it looked like he had lost that transplant also. We were resigned to his death before he turned 10 year-old. That's pretty much what we expected until June 2001 when his transplant went from a dismal failure to a resounding success. I will tell you about that as I build this blog.
Early on in my journalizing, I began to write from what I perceived would be Loren's one year-old viewpoint. That is the reason you will find massive misspellings and other gramatical errors in most of the posts until I finally get caught up to 2007. I will try to get there as soon as possible. I will also, finally, see if I can get Loren to say a few words instead of using my own and pretending I am him.
After Loren's first transplant, I compiled the journals to that point and published a book called Cookin' At Cook: A Babe in Transplantland. In retrospect, I am sorry I called it that, but that's the name and I am sticking with the title now. If you go to Loren's Place bookstore, you will find a link to several major book sellers. I would appreciate it if you clicked on one of those links (Amazon is a good one) and buy the book.
I won't lie to you. I want the book to sell because I need the income. It's not that I do badly in my chosen profession as a certified public accountant, but the expenses of taking care of three kids, one of whom has a terminal disease and requires a lot of physical, speech and occupational therapy are daunting. Thank God for family.
I also plan to give at least 10% of what I make to the National MPS Society , the organization that advocates for kids like Loren and a few other organizations that have blessed Loren and my family greatly. The money for the MPS Society will probably be earmarked for family support. I don't know how much you, the reader know about terminal diseases, but they don't just affect the patient. They affect everyone in the family. Last night, my 17 year-old son remarked that he went without a mother for several years so his baby brother would live. That happened because the transplant was in Fort Worth, Texas; three hours away from our home and we were lucky it was so close.
The point is that such diseases take a tremendous toll on everyone in the immediate and extended family. I am convinced that Loren's disease was the catalyst for my own mother succumbing to psychosomatic illnesses that eventually led to real illness that she couldn't handle, so she killed herself. The stresses can be that bad and anything I can do to support other people in their fight to keep their child or children alive, is something I want to do.
I guess that leads me to the final reason for this blog. It's time I got back into the business of writing down my experiences so others might benefit from my family's experience. As we say in AA, we need to share our experience, strength and hope in order to help others escape from a living hell and to keep ourselves from falling back into it.
So, there you have it. This will be a selfish page where I shamelessly try to get people to buy my first book so the publisher will want to publish the second book. It will also be an altruistic page that I hope brings help and healing to all who read it.
By the way, with the success of his second transplant, Loren's disease is in check and he is doing well. Although I expect a long life for him, others feel he won't live much past his 21st birthday. Most of the time I live in a fantasy world, but a long life for my little pal is one fantasy I hope to see become reality.
Finally, Loren will now be taking back over this journal. Although he is now in third grade, he still has difficulty expressing himself and, while he will spell better than eight years ago, he still has his own unique and inspired viewpoint on life. He is a special kid, and so are his brother and sister.
Excited!
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